January 30, 2008
Chpt. 11 Created to Be His Help Meet
Sorry this post is late. We've had a crazy week which included being stormed stayed in Winnipeg on Monday.
I enjoyed many parts of this chapter but the part that stood out the most to me was where Debi talks about the woman who reminds her husband of what he was going to do in a manner of saying, “I am holding you to it” I have been very guilty of this and Mark has called me on it a few times. When he has commented about doing something and I take it as a ‘I am going to do this” and then if he doesn’t do it I say “But you said….” And I recognize now what this has done is caused him to keep part of his heart to himself because it is not worth my comments later on. I have indeed been guilty of what she says on pg. 114 “Using your special knowledge of you husband as leverage to get your way.”
Another part that stood out to me was she talks about a woman’s spirituality. Today it is definitely measured by how spiritual she looks on the outside, what positions she holds in the church, how ‘spiritual’ her lingo is, a prayer warrior. But when do you ever hear a woman’s spiritual standing judged on how submissive she is to her husband? I can’t recall ever hearing this. I believe this is because of a lost view of what a woman’s calling really is. It isn’t the view of the virtuous woman described in Proverbs 31.
“Is your desire for your husband? (Gen. 3:16) Do you live to please him? Or do you expect him to live up to your convictions and whims? Do you spend your days in angry frustration over his unwillingness to change to your specifications? “ pg. 116
January 25, 2008
New Kids on the Block
January 23, 2008
Reactions Define You
Review of chapter 10 from the book 'Created to be His Help Meet' by Debi Pearl
A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil; for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.” Luke 6:45
As as he thinketh in his heart, so is he…” Proverbs 23:7
I could stop right there. These verses give so much to think about. It really gives no excuse for the words that I say to others, that I speak to my husband. What is in my heart is going to come out of my mouth.
After reading this chapter I became very conscious of what was in my heart. And to tell you the truth, I was often times very shocked. But it also made me understand why I sometimes have a hard time being a submissive wife. My heart is in the wrong place because of the thoughts I have been harbouring.
So I have been training myself to evaluate my words, am I speaking words of praise or bitterness. Are the words that I speak to my husband out of a heart that has been harbouring bitterness or lifting my husband up. Even in my thoughts I can be unsubmissive. It isn’t just action. Really when a bitter thought comes into my head and I let that simmer, this is where I begin my road of evil thoughts that will eventually come out of my mouth and be shown in my actions.
If this truth can become part of my heart (out of my heart my mouth speaks) I believe I will have a much easier time submitting because my heart will already be there. And I believe it has already helped me a lot. As soon as I find myself thinking thoughts that are not honouring of my husband and I can recognize them as such and begin to give these things to God, I am one step ahead than if I had dwelt on these thoughts and let them simmer in my heart. If I can truly say in my heart “Not my will, but thine be done,” then I will be able to rest in my heart and submit.
Where are your thoughts today, are they bringing you close to your journey of becoming a godly wife, or are they hindering you?
January 19, 2008
Not Much in Life is Free
But the Manitoba Ag Show was.
So on Thursday we went as a family.
It can be very expensive for our family to go to things like this when you have to pay per person.
But this was totally free!
The little boys had great fun climbing on all the newest machinery and trucks, eating too much candy at the booths, getting free toys, collecting many machinery pamphlets & cd's, and lots and lots of walking.
I got some free recipes, free popcorn (for those of you who know me well, you know that popcorn is one of my favorite snacks), free pens, and free excercise!
I posted a picture here but Megan had the camera and the older 4 were off with their friends so the pictures are all about them :)
But all and all it was fun and it was FREE!!!! (OK, maybe that excites me a little too much!)
January 13, 2008
Created to be His Help Meet Chpt. 8 & 9
I combined this week’s study with last weeks because chapter 8 was pretty much each person to themselves. I appreciated this chapter because it did help me understand my husband a little better and why he is the way he is.
The reason I like this book is because every week it reminds me of my role as a wife. It is so easy to loose focus, to become something other than my husbands helpmeet. I hope there is a time soon that this will become part of my heart and that I can serve joyfully with out the constant struggle of my flesh. But right now I confess that I still struggle on a daily basis to be a helpmeet, an extension of my husband.
This weeks lesson reminded me once again of the many mistakes I have made as a wife. My husband is primarily a steady and I know I have crushed or belittled his ideas and dreams too many times and he has shut down in those areas. Thank God for His grace and for my husbands forgiveness, but I know that I still am reaping the consequences for my actions. Those things don’t just get rebuilt overnight. It takes time and I think sometimes some things are never restored.
Here are some of my favourite principles of this chapter.
First of all I love the title of the chapter “Finding Your Life In His”
As I thought about this, I thought of how marriage is a picture of the church and how we know that as the bride of Christ we are to find our life in Christ’s. It is the same for me as a wife to my husband, I am to find my life in his. Not my dreams, ambitions, goals….but his. And in this I will find true joy.
pg. 95
“Because of his wife’s controlling hand and his desire to ‘do his duty’ and please her, he had failed to live his dreams.” I guess this really got me, because I know that many times my ‘controlling hand’ I have caused my husband to try to please me and therefore he has not lived out the God given dream that has been placed in him. Even though my husband is a steady, he does have dreams, and I think sometimes they take me by surprise and often my first reaction is to make him know how unrealistic or silly those dreams are. When in fact I should be there to encourage his dreams and let God take care of the rest.
As I thought about this, I thought of how marriage is a picture of the church and how we know that as the bride of Christ we are to find our life in Christ’s. It is the same for me as a wife to my husband, I am to find my life in his. Not my dreams, ambitions, goals….but his. And in this I will find true joy.
pg. 95
“Because of his wife’s controlling hand and his desire to ‘do his duty’ and please her, he had failed to live his dreams.” I guess this really got me, because I know that many times my ‘controlling hand’ I have caused my husband to try to please me and therefore he has not lived out the God given dream that has been placed in him. Even though my husband is a steady, he does have dreams, and I think sometimes they take me by surprise and often my first reaction is to make him know how unrealistic or silly those dreams are. When in fact I should be there to encourage his dreams and let God take care of the rest.
Pg. 97
“God is not looking for happy women to make them into help meets for men. He is looking for women willing to be true helpmeets, so he can fill them full of joy.” Joy is so much better than happiness. Joy is true, deep inner fulfillment. It is not temporary, it is lasting, it is eternal. The choice is mine, do I want the temporary fulfillment of being my own self with my own goals and ambitions, or will I choose to be a helpmeet to my husband and be filled with joy. I think I choose the latter!
“God is not looking for happy women to make them into help meets for men. He is looking for women willing to be true helpmeets, so he can fill them full of joy.” Joy is so much better than happiness. Joy is true, deep inner fulfillment. It is not temporary, it is lasting, it is eternal. The choice is mine, do I want the temporary fulfillment of being my own self with my own goals and ambitions, or will I choose to be a helpmeet to my husband and be filled with joy. I think I choose the latter!
As I pondered this chapter I realized again how society is so opposite of God’s plan for the wife’s role in a marriage. From the books we read, from the movies we watch, from the magazine articles we pour over, from the messages in the advertisements….the list goes on and on. I get so frustrated sometimes that no one taught me this when I was a young married wife and that I took my guidance from the world instead of God‘s Word. Where were those older women that were to teach me? But I guess my duty is not to bemoan the fact that I wasn’t taught, but instead pick up from here and ask God for wisdom to change my ways and not to be confident in the fact that I want to be my husbands helpmeet. Also to make sure that I am there to teach the younger women now, so that they will not have to wake up like me someday and realize all the times they could have been a helpmeet to their husbands and were not.
So if you are a woman reading this today the question is:
“Are you finding your life in your husbands? Are you being a blessing to him, a true friend, an encouragement, an extension of him? My prayer is that I will be that to my husband and that as I seek God for wisdom on how to do this, He will grant it to me as He promises in His word.
“Are you finding your life in your husbands? Are you being a blessing to him, a true friend, an encouragement, an extension of him? My prayer is that I will be that to my husband and that as I seek God for wisdom on how to do this, He will grant it to me as He promises in His word.
“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.”
James 1:5
James 1:5
By the way, Friday is not turning out to be a very good day to do this study, so I am changing it to Tuesday.
January 11, 2008
A Special Day In History
THEN
On January 8, 1968 a MARVELOUS thing happened. God chose to send a little boy into the world.
He was cute as a button and his parents soon knew what an AGILE boy he was as he grew.
A REMARKABLE guy, that's why they named him so, with his KINDHEARTED and KOOKY ways, if you've met him you know!
As he grew into a handome young guy, but there was one particular gal, he caught her eye.
Even thought she said she never wanted to marry and AGRICULTURALIST, once she got to know this LOVEABLE guy it didn't take her long to want to be his wife.
So on a sunny day in September they were wed and the rest is history as the phrase is said.
But history was still made as the years went by as they learned how to be husband and wife.
There were many things this gal loved about her man, but many things still suprised her that she had not planned.
She would say she would like something built and to her delight this guy would get out his hammer and a masterpiece would unfold before her eyes.
It was then she realized what an ARTISTIC guy he really was, any girls dream, how could she not love.
Today they are still married so happily, and she realizes why Mrs. Mark Pauls she wanted to be.
NO-NONSENSE is the motto he often lives by, if there is a job to do, do it, no matter how hard it looks, he will always try.
Today you will see him as a PASSIONATE guy; from the way he loves his God to the love that he show his children and wife.
He is an AFFECTIONATE man who loves to hug, and is often found giving someone in his family a cuddle.
UNBEATABLE is he in his wit and one liners, and likes to get us all laughing and make the mood lighter.
He makes our home LIVELY with never a dull moment and we couldn't imagine our life without him in it!
Yet with all this fun a SWEET, STEADY guy is he, and we would want no one else to lead our family.
HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY TO MY ONE AND ONLY!
I LOVE YOU!
M-MARVELOUS
A-AGILE
R-REMARKABLE
K-KINDHEARTED, KOOKY
A-AGRICULTURALIST
L-LOVEABLE
A-ARTISTIC
N-NO-NONSENSE
P-PASSIONATE
A-AFFECTIONATE
U-UNBEATABLE
L-LIVELY
S- SWEET, STEADY
NOW
January 5, 2008
January 3, 2008
A Sick Mama
Well for the first time in 4 years the stomach flue hit me hard.
Yesterday Jesse and I were both sick in bed all day.
But as I was laying there out of it, not able to take care of my family,
my daughters took up the slack.
I was so proud of them, as I was not even able to give instruction.
They just took over and made the household run smoothly.
Sometimes with your children you have discipline/disciple moment
after moment, and you don't see immediate fruits of your labor.
I remember years ago when I was a mom of many young ones ( I guess I still am!) and wondered when I would see the good all my daily correction was doing.
But I now see fruit many times from our kids, and yesterday will always
stand out in my mind. What a relief it was to know that all I had to do was get better.
So just a word of encouragement for all you moms out there.
There may be days when it seems all you do is correct your children,
but the day will come when you will see the fruits of your hard labor.
So keep on keep'in on :)
ps If you think of our family please pray for us as the flue has now hit Brooke and Mikaya.
pps The above photo Megan took on Christmas Eve day
January 1, 2008
A Mother's Reflection of 18 years Happy Birthday Joshua
It seems like only yesterday,
We waited to meet our little bundle.
Someone we had been waiting to meet for so many months
We wondered what you would look like, who would you resemble.
What would your personality be like.
As more siblings were added to our family you became such a great big brother! When they were with you I could be sure that everything would be taken care of, because that’s the way you liked things to be. In order and justice prevailing. You were also good at getting your sister Jennifer to do the things you didn’t have the courage to do. “Jennifer, you pick up that snake, Jennifer, you climb up that tree.”! As the years went on you became a big brother many times over and every time you had a love, a cuddle, a smile.
As I watch you watch you with your brothers and sisters now, I see how much your approval means to them. They look up to you and that is because of the many years of love you have given them.
You have always loved the farm life. When you were little and would work with your dad you would watch things so closely, and if something seemed out of the norm, you would tell him and usually it was a problem that needed attention. When it came time for you to start doing things on your own, some stuff you didn’t have to be taught because you had been so attentive over the years. We are still amazed many times at your maturity and dependability. I know I don’t say it to you enough but you are a very good worker.
We never bought into the lie of the world that thing called ‘teenage rebellion’. We were confident that if we raised you according to the way God tells us in His word that you would not rebel. I thought when we came to this day that you turned 18 I would say ‘We made it’! but instead I say the journey goes on. Yes we have come a long way together, but the journey is not over. You have grown into another stage in your life where you will be taking on more responsibility, and more decisions. And I can say that I am very confident that you will continue to be a steady, godly young man. I wondered when we got here, would I be afraid to let you make decisions for fear of you making the wrong one? Although I know none of us are perfect and you are no exception, I am confident of who you are in Christ. I am confident that you will not act on whims or feelings, but that you will follow the leading of your heavenly Father and continue to ask for the advice of your Dad. Because I know that over the years you have learned wisdom. Life has a way of teaching us things, and I believe that you have put to heart the things that you have learned.
I could not be more proud of you, I would never want anyone to replace you as our son. I am so glad that God chose you to be our first born and I look forward to many more years on this journey of life and learning. But just remember, we are still learning! Everything that happens from here on is still a first for us! But we still know and believe that when we ask God for wisdom He will give it to us. Praise Him for His grace and His never-ending love.
As you journey on may you fully understand the plan God has for you. May you not live your life according to the way you think man would have you live, but rather the way God would have you live. May you always look to Him for the decisions you will have to make. May you never take your eyes off of Him. May you love God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. "Above all else, may you guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life". Proverbs 4:23
We waited to meet our little bundle.
Someone we had been waiting to meet for so many months
We wondered what you would look like, who would you resemble.
What would your personality be like.
Of course you decided that you would like to enter the world as a celebrity.
So you chose to be born on New Year’s Day.
We couldn’t think of a better way to start out the New Year.
So you chose to be born on New Year’s Day.
We couldn’t think of a better way to start out the New Year.
It didn’t take us long to realize the deep love that a parent can have for their child.
You were so perfect, little round face, 10 little fingers, 10 little toes, and to top it all off
amazing red hair.
You were so perfect, little round face, 10 little fingers, 10 little toes, and to top it all off
amazing red hair.
Our journey with you began. We sometimes felt sorry for you as we were new to this parenting thing and we had so much to learn. But we learned together. We knew that as long as we kept crying out to God for wisdom that He would direct our path. This doesn’t mean we didn’t make mistakes, we made many, but the forgiveness of a child and of our God is so refreshing. We had many live and learn moments and we still do.
You were such a cute little guy. You loved anything with wheels. You followed your dad around whenever you could. But you did not like bugs, donuts and mud (or anything else sticky or dirty).
You have given us so many memories. Remember this phrase “Are you going to take a picture?” A family shares so many things, little things that would mean nothing to others, but to us it is our identity. It a phrase or a word that we can say and only we know what it means!
As you began to grow up, we saw more and more the personality God gave you that was only unique to you.
I remember when you were with Dad and I when we were having a conversation with another adult how you would just stand there and stare at that person. Many times we would have liked to know what you were thinking, but you just stared with such concentration.
I remember when you were with Dad and I when we were having a conversation with another adult how you would just stand there and stare at that person. Many times we would have liked to know what you were thinking, but you just stared with such concentration.
As more siblings were added to our family you became such a great big brother! When they were with you I could be sure that everything would be taken care of, because that’s the way you liked things to be. In order and justice prevailing. You were also good at getting your sister Jennifer to do the things you didn’t have the courage to do. “Jennifer, you pick up that snake, Jennifer, you climb up that tree.”! As the years went on you became a big brother many times over and every time you had a love, a cuddle, a smile.
As I watch you watch you with your brothers and sisters now, I see how much your approval means to them. They look up to you and that is because of the many years of love you have given them.
You have always loved the farm life. When you were little and would work with your dad you would watch things so closely, and if something seemed out of the norm, you would tell him and usually it was a problem that needed attention. When it came time for you to start doing things on your own, some stuff you didn’t have to be taught because you had been so attentive over the years. We are still amazed many times at your maturity and dependability. I know I don’t say it to you enough but you are a very good worker.
We never bought into the lie of the world that thing called ‘teenage rebellion’. We were confident that if we raised you according to the way God tells us in His word that you would not rebel. I thought when we came to this day that you turned 18 I would say ‘We made it’! but instead I say the journey goes on. Yes we have come a long way together, but the journey is not over. You have grown into another stage in your life where you will be taking on more responsibility, and more decisions. And I can say that I am very confident that you will continue to be a steady, godly young man. I wondered when we got here, would I be afraid to let you make decisions for fear of you making the wrong one? Although I know none of us are perfect and you are no exception, I am confident of who you are in Christ. I am confident that you will not act on whims or feelings, but that you will follow the leading of your heavenly Father and continue to ask for the advice of your Dad. Because I know that over the years you have learned wisdom. Life has a way of teaching us things, and I believe that you have put to heart the things that you have learned.
I could not be more proud of you, I would never want anyone to replace you as our son. I am so glad that God chose you to be our first born and I look forward to many more years on this journey of life and learning. But just remember, we are still learning! Everything that happens from here on is still a first for us! But we still know and believe that when we ask God for wisdom He will give it to us. Praise Him for His grace and His never-ending love.
As you journey on may you fully understand the plan God has for you. May you not live your life according to the way you think man would have you live, but rather the way God would have you live. May you always look to Him for the decisions you will have to make. May you never take your eyes off of Him. May you love God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. "Above all else, may you guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life". Proverbs 4:23
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)