Chapter 19 Chaste

Titus 2:5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Chaste- Pure in all thought, word, and act and to be modest and honorable in all things. This chapter really hits home for me. Maybe because we have 1 teenage son and 3 teenage daughters. Modesty is something that I feel is always having to be evaluated around here. I get frustrated with the clothing that is out there for young ladies. My girls want to look feminine and yet ‘feminine’ by the worlds standards is ‘the lower & the tighter the better’ in both shirts and pants. And bathing suits are another whole different story. Last year a couple of our girls needed swim suits. After searching high and low….we found nothing that was modest. In the young teens size almost everything was a bikini or very low cut (high cut on the legs). So they just ended up wearing a tank top and shorts over their bathing suits to cover what wasn’t covered. And for our son, I feel bad that he can’t even go shopping without seeing ‘ungodly images’ on the magazines at the checkout stand…never mind the images when going to the beach. A while back the girls and I read a book called “Dear Princess” In it there is a chapter about modest & outward beauty. Man looks on the outward appearance but God looks at the heart. (1 Samuel 16:7) Something that they said in the book that has challenged me over and over was…When you look into the mirror instead of asking yourself if you look ‘good’, ask yourself if you are brining glory to God by the way you are dressing. Dress as if you were dressing for Him. As Debi put it “A woman’s clothes, hair, and adornments-not just her mouth-make a loud profession to all who see her that she is modest and godly, or that she is immodest and ungodly. I appreciate the way Debi addressed the whole ‘women dressing in men’s apparel’ issue. Please understand that I am not attacking any one person here. But I do think that this whole dress vs. pants issue can so easily become a ‘law’. As I talked about before, ‘God looks at the heart’. I have seen some girls and women who were against wearing pants and only wore dresses whose ‘heart appearance’ was nothing to be desired. It doesn’t matter to me if people choose to dress different than I do, but it does matter to me if it becomes law above real heart issues. We do wear pants in our home. A few years ago as I was reading and meditating on Deut. 2:5 I approached my husband and asked him if this meant that I should start wearing dresses. We came up to the same conclusion as was mentioned in this chapter, this verse is referring to cross dressing to look like the opposite gender. In reading scriptures and seeing how men and woman both wore robes and men wore skirts, the whole ‘wearing pants is dressing like a man’ thing didn’t make sense to us. In fact my husband would prefer me not to wear a dress. He likes me as his ‘farm girl’ and so he prefers me in jeans and a sweat shirt. So I have barely any dresses in my closet. And you know what, I don’t feel guilty about it! So ask your husband as the leader of your home what he would like. All this to say, ‘Don’t judge a book by it’s cover’. Just because someone does or doesn’t wear a skirt does not indictate her walk with God. So when you see someone who wears pants while you only wear dresses or visa versa, don’t get this ‘more righteous than thou’ attitude. Get to know that person, get to know their heart and then make your conclusions. I have to say I found the story of Bob a little to the extreme. I don’t think this would happen to the average ‘Bob’. I do believe though that we as ladies have to think seriously about the way we dress and that we can very easily be an unknowing participant in visual adultery. My daughters and I routinely check with my husband to ask if a certain thing we are wearing is ‘modest’. Why, because he is a man, and something that we may think nothing of, he may see differently. So all this to say: fashion is not the most important thing. Dressing to the glory of God is. So next time you get dressed look in the mirror and ask yourself this question, “Does what I am wearing bring glory to God? Would my Heavenly Father be pleased with me?” And please teach this to your daughters. Start when they are young. Even a baby can be modest. Why would you want to back track. Remember that your daughters happiness is not more important than her holiness. When I was a teenager and my dad stepped in and gave his opinion on my clothing I wasn't too impressed at the time. But now I look back and realize that was one of the most loving things my dad could have done for me. In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair or gold, or pearls, or costly array; but (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works. 1 Timothy 2:9-10

Blow Me Down!

For those of you who live in Manitoba you know how extremely windy it was today!

The younger ones had a lot of fun being "pushed by the wind"

The wind was supposed to gust to 60kph, not sure what it actually did.

This seems to be a necessary part of getting some warm weather these days:)

The Lord's Prayer

Someone sent this to me.

I had to post it, it is just too cute!

Remembering our Nellie

We once had a silly goat, her name was Nellie. She gave us many laughs and a couple of babies too. She is no longer part of our farm animals, but here is tribute to her:)

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

I Got Dumped Contest

4tunate is having a contest.

Here's how it works.

1. Dump Your Camera - whatever is on it RIGHT NOW, don't take any more pictures before uploading, that's cheating.

2. Email me your favorite picture from your upload (quatro_mama[at]yahoo[dot]com). It can be funny, completely random, silly, cute, etc. If you have a blog, you can post your favorite "dump" and refer to this contest.

3. Leave me a comment here to let me know that you're participating, so I can keep a look-out for your email.

4. Your deadline is 11:59pm FRIDAY, APRIL 11th.

6. I will pick out my favorite 10 and post them to this blog.

7. YOU get to vote for your favorite. The winner will receive a mystery (yet to be determined) prize.

A Day in the Life of Mikaya

On Mikaya's birthday the girls decided to take some farm pictures.

I thought they were too cute not to share:)

To Be Discreet (Chpt. 18)

“As a jewel in a swine’s mouth, so is a woman without discretion.” Proverbs 11:22 SEEK TO BE COURTEOUS I like the story of the Red Truck. How this man borrowed a piece of junk but he returned it in much better shape, fixing the floor, made it run better and even filled it with gas. We live in a society that tells us to get all you can, even if it means bowling someone over in the process. This made me think of how many times in life I just want things to go good my way and I forget about the other person. I want to seek to be courteous in my dealings and socializing with others. I don't want to be seen as a user of other people. SEEK TO BE HONEST In our parenting class we discussed how as parents we need to be honesty. If we aren’t honest how can we expect our children to be. Eg. When someone calls that I don’t want to talk to, telling my family to tell them that I am not home……dishonest. When we go to a place with a salad bar/buffet and instead of paying for our little ones we let them eat off our plate, or bring back desserts for everyone at the table….dishonest. If you get a drink from a drink machine and 2 drinks pop out and instead of returning it you say…”Today I am blessed!”…..dishonest. When you buy something and the cashier gives you back too much change and you smile and keep it……dishonest. Selling something for way more than it is worth….dishonest. I know of people who feel God has blessed them when other people get ripped off. Hmmmm….what’s wrong with that picture? SEEK TO BE GRACIOUS I have much to learn in this area. When Debi said to this lady “The real issue is your heart’s perspective.” I realize that my heart is not right many times and that’s why I struggle with the way that I approach things. So many times the things I say comes out all wrong and this is because of what is in my heart. When there is a conflict is when I realize that there is an issue in my heart. LACK OF JUDGEMENT “Every wise woman builds her house; but the foolish pluck it down with her hands.” Prov. 14:1 Debi mentions how our words can color our husband’s perspective. The questions we sometimes ask our husbands can make him feel like a nit-wit!!! TRAITS OF A GODLY WOMAN -Chaste -Sober -Modest -Shamefacedness -Meek -Quiet Spirit -In subjection -Obedient -Kind -Virtuous -Prudent -Good -Discreet -Keeper at Home School -Gracious There was so much in this chapter, so many character traits to address. So read it, and tell me what you got out of it!

Two Birthdays

This week we celebrated another 2 birthdays.

April 3rd was Mikaya's 1st and the 4th was Nathan's 4th.

So I will start with a birthday tribute to Mikaya:

Wow, 1 year old already. On one hand it seems like you were born just yesterday, and yet I can't imagine what life was like without you.


We always have so much fun with you. You are a very joyful baby with lots of life that shows all over your face. When you smile even your eyes twinkle. So everyone here loves to make you laugh and you humor us by complying.



You are very good at communicating. We taught you to sign early and so you use the signs: please, all done & more regularily. Sometimes you look like a back catcher with all the signs you throw out! You also try to say many words, your favorite one is puppy which you say when you see anything that is furry or has 4 legs. You really like animals and are often found looking out the window trying to find the 'pup pup' (always said in a whisper).

Your sisters keep trying to convince you to walk but you think it's faster crawling. You can walk quite a few steps on your own and I am sure you could take off it you so chose. Personally I think you just like all the attention of everyone coaxing you to walk :)

You have so many nick names and you are only 1 years old thanks to your kooky family:) Mickey-Annia (Brooke), Mickey (Dad), Kaya-Banaya (Jennifer), Kaya (all), Kaya-Anne (all) just to name a few.

The bond between your sister Brooke and you is deepening. It's amazing to see how a 3 yr. old and a 1 yr. old interact and communicate. When you are in your playpen Brooke must feel sorry for you as she will crawl right in and play with you for a long time. She really loves you and I am sure you will have many great years playing 'house' together.

Your older siblings all love you to bits. Jennifer, Megan and Kerri take such good care of you and give you endless hugs and kisses. Joshua rarely misses a day that he doesn't cuddle and talk with you. (you are a great cuddler:) Caleb loves to hold you and thinks you are just so funny. And Zachary gives you lots of hugs on the run (because he is always on the run!), Jesse, & Nathan are often loving you 'in your face' and you try very hard to be patient with them, but sometimes you just have to let them know you would like some space. And of course Daddy give you lots and lots of Daddy cuddles which you love and ask for many times a day. Mommy gets her cuddle time in when she nurses you and it's a good thing or she might never get to hold you!

So as we reflect on this year that you have been in our family we feel especially blessed that God chose you, Mikaya, to come and join our crew. We look forward to many years of loving, training and playing with you. We love you! Happy Birthday!

Now on to Nathan!

Well you started off your life just right when you were born 4 years ago on 04/04/04. God knew after having to remember 8 other birthdates that we needed an easy one!

Our Natey-Boy. Where do I begin?

I think I will start with your smile. You have this contagious smile that is.... well....contagious!

It lights up your mouth, your eyes and even your ears! We love your smile. So.. keep on smiling!

God knew we needed you in our family. Daddy needed another little buddy to help him and we needed another helper in the kitchen. And of course He knew we needed to brush up our parenting skills. We have had some challenges, but through those challenges we have learned and grown. Thanks for those life lessons!

From day one you have known what you wanted, how you wanted it and when! So we have many character training moments through these times.

Your nose is amazing. You can tell when you walk in the house what we are baking or having for supper. I think that has attributed to your preferences in food but you have been gracious as you have learned to have 'no thank you' helpings even if it isn't your favorite food.

You have been working very hard at having a good attitude when asked to do things and you have come such a long way. Thanks for trying so hard.

We love all your hugs and kisses. And do we ever get a lot of them. Also the way you call your little sister 'Beautiful'. If you get married some day I am sure your wife will be very pleased:)

What a great little helper you are. You dry the dishes, help clean off the table, help the girls clean the house, help daddy outside. And the greatest thing is how you see what needs to be done and do it without being asked. Just keep it up, OKAY!

Love, Life and Laughter. That's our Natey-Boy. We love you Nate and are so glad that you are part of our family. We look forward to another year of watching you grow and mature and become a little man. Happy Birthday Nate.

FARWELL (By Jennifer)

Well the fateful day has come and gone.

The day that we had to say goodbye to our winter companion, the skating rink.

It has served us well all winter, every day and sometimes even twice a day.

Usually we are very glad when winter is over, but this year I think everyone was a little disappointed. When our rink started to melt, we all begged it to stay, but the warm weather prevailed and now our trusty friend is gone.

It did indeed make the winter months shorter as it took up a couple of hours of every afternoon (and it was a lot cheaper than going to Disney World!). From 0 C to -35C, stormy or calm, we skated our hearts out (and often our energy). We were many times grateful for the warming shack that Dad converted from an old granary. It even has a wood stove to warm up our toesies. The plywood sheets around the edges were a great improvement, for we had something to deflect the ball and sometimes the bodies:)

Our dog Jamie brushed up her "retriever" skills. When many a ball would go flying over the end, we would call her to the job. We would show her the general direction the ball was in, she would dive nose first and usually come up with the ball in her mouth. Occasionally (ok, quite often) we would have to coax her to give it back to us and then we were playing again.

Hockey was our favorite thing to do this year and the whole family got involved. Our positions you ask? Well Dad is great at everything, Mom is terrific at offence, Josh is also quite good at it all, but is best at offence, Jen learned to be a great goal tender and/or defence (in mom's words), Megan played mostly defence but also goal tender, Kerri was the “cherry picker” and had reflexes that nobody could match, Caleb was an excellent goal tender, Zachary was a tripper :) , Jesse (when he played) was goal tender, Nathan was mostly a playmate to Brooke and last but not least Mikaya was always kind enough to have a nap while we hit the ice.

We have many good memories, but also as ice is hard we had a few accidents. Can you guess who had the most? DAD! He scraped up his elbows, bruised up his knees, hurt his tail bone and after a few bumps he finally resolved to get elbow and knee pads. But that didn’t stop the cut in his lip, and the black eye! Of course the rest of us also got a bunch of bumps and bruises, but we are all still alive so all is well that ends well. We had lots of fun and there were even some character building moments:)

The good times that we have are too many to name and will forever be written in our Pauls’ family memories.

So now all of the sticks, skates, hockey tape, nets, elbow and knee pads and band-aids will be put away…. ‘til next year.

Farewell to you, old faithful skating rink!

To Love Their Children (Chapter 17)

I remember going through the struggle a few years back of thinking I was not getting enough ‘spiritual me-time’ and I lamented the fact that I could not go to ladies Bible Studies or spend hours at a time reading God’s Word. A friend told me of a lady who would pull her apron over her head when she felt she needed to spend some ‘quiet’ time with God. I came to the point that I realized that as my children were little I didn’t need to have a time set aside during the day to ‘worship God’ I could do it throughout the day, all day long. Singing, memorizing or meditating on a scripture verse, reading a few verses from the Bible. And in mourning over the fact that I could not have regular devotions, I was in a way mourning the fact that I had children that would keep me up all night, or interrupt me during the day. And then I realized that my biggest act of worship is in my daily living. I can have devotions all day long, but if I am not acting out what I study it is all worthless. So if I lock myself in a room and have some ‘spiritual quiet time’ while my kids are running wild and needing discipline, I don’t believe this is worship to God. Worship is obeying His Word in being the best wife and mother that I can be. And this may mean for a time I will not be able to have regular sit down devotion time. But I can spend time with God throughout the day as praying, meditating and worshipping Him. This is a season that God has given me and I intend to worship Him through it, whatever way I can. Mothers have an amazing opportunity daily to be the primary trainers of their children. We are with them day after day, hour after hour and who better knows them than we do? God didn’t give this job to grandparents, friends or babysitters, but he gave it to us, as parents. And most often this job falls in the moms lap because dad is at work all day. What better way to be a help meet to our husbands than to train our little ones to be obedient and live according to God’s standard. I have heard many a wife who will push off the training issues until dad gets home from work and then hand the kids over to him (all frazzled I might add) for their daily discipline issues. Issues that could have been dealt with during the day, but mom was just too preoccupied or plain lazy to deal with them. In my opinion it should be a very rare moment that dad has to deal with an ‘issue’ when he comes home from work. Especially with little ones (by this I mean pre-school age). If things are properly dealt with during the day by mom, dad should be able to come home, enjoy his ‘well trained’ children and relax. It will take a lot of putting aside our own thing to discipline, but it will be well worth it in the end. Little issues become bigger issues and by the end of the day they can be a volcano just waiting to erupt. Training our children as Debi puts it is ‘a full time occupation’. This brings me to the next subject, a subject that is tip-toed around very lightly in this day and age. So if I offend some of you I am sorry, but I will not water down what I believe in order not to offend. This subject is the assumption that we can leave our children with other people (daycare, caregiver, friends, even grandparents) day after day and assume that we are fulfilling our role as a mother. NOT. Who knows your child’s issues better than you do, and who can train them in love better than you do? Sending your children somewhere else while you go and ‘work’ outside the home, I believe, is really not the way God designed the family to be. God designed a mother to nurture, nourish, love, protect and train our children 24/7. Yes there may be the few instances where we leave them behind to let someone else to take care of them, but this should be the exception rather than the norm. God is quite clear in Titus 2:5 that women are to love their children and to be keeper’s at home. Why do we think that we can do things contrary to God’s Word and yet function as a family that will bring honor and glory to Him? God’s design is the best design and we should think very carefully before we decide that we know better. We only have one chance at rasing our children and how sad it would be if years down the road we look back and realize we should have done things differently. And I don’t want anyone to say to me, “Why were you not brave enough to tell me your convictions.” So there you have it.

Chapter 15 (Part 2)

I loved the story of the lady who’s husband came home on a hot day and said he would have rathered a cold meal than the hot one she had just sweated over to make. She said she was hurt and sad, but her most compelling thought was to figure out how to prepare cold meals for her husband. Oh to be there! Instead of getting angry when my husband wants something done differently, to figure out to do it the way he wants it. This is another thing we tell our children often. If you really have your parents heart desires as your heart desires then you will look for ways to do what they ask efficiently and thoroughly. This reminds me of when I first started helping Mark with our cows. There are many times you need to chase those blessed creatures, and many times they don’t go exactly where you want them to go. It was a real character building time in our marriage every time we would chase cows. I didn’t get the ‘cow chasing gene’. I always seemed to move the wrong way, or chicken out at the last moment and let them by. This frustrated Mark to no end. It got to the point where I dreaded chasing cows because of the tension it brought between us. That is until I started to learn to ignore the way I thought cows should be chased, put aside my fears, and listen to how Mark wanted things done. Mark is an ‘all or nothing type of guy’, and when he puts his heart into doing something it’s all. That includes chasing cows. So I had to learn this way. I remember one of the first times I determined to give it my all. We were chasing in muck (the manure kind) over our ankles and when I ran forward my boots stayed behind. So I was running around in bare feet with ‘muck’ oozing up between my toes. But my heart was in it, and at that point I was more set on pleasing my husband than having clean feet. And you know what, there was no tension, and was my hubby ever proud of me! Another thing that I have been working on over the years is serving my husband after he puts in a long day. I have heard many women say that when their husbands get home from work they hand over the kids and demand to have ‘their time’. I don’t think this is fair to their husband and it shows an attitude of me-ism. If they were thinking about him, they would realize that maybe he had a hard day as well and serve him instead of demand things of him. For my husband, farming (as many jobs) can have their very high stress moments. I have learned that there are times not to bring up problems that I am having around the house (and it’s usually in the busiest season that things go wrong!). Sometimes it is a few days before he can address my problems, because he usually has way more problems than I do which hinge on our making a living. It may mean that my life will be a little more complicated but that is okay. And as I have honored him more and more in this area I have seen in his heart a desire to take care of my problems the first possible moment. I don’t think the results would be the same if I conceded to nagging about it. Instead when he comes home I try to have a snack ready and take the time to sit there and talk with him about his day. “Try to make your home a place of peace and order, where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.” This is one of the reasons why I think woman should not work outside the home. Being a wife is your career. How can you be 100% commited to serving your husband when most of your energies are spent on your job. Not that being at home with your children doesn’t take energy, but at least you have opportunities throughout the day to do things that will honor your husband and you are constantly being reminded of your #1 sweetie. If my husband can come home to a good meal, a tidy house, well mannered kids, and a wife who desires to serve him, our home will be an oasis for him, a place where he can recharge. In her letter Freida made a comment that I thought was great. “I intended my marriage to be my career for the rest of my life and I intended to be successful at it.” This is my career. This is where my heart should be. Why would I want to work anywhere else? Why would I want to be successful anywhere else? The other day at church a couple of ladies were talking about working wives/moms. One lady made a comment that caught my attention. She said her sister works in a hospital and that it is actually a break to go to work and get away from her kids. And I think that is often the case. Sometimes working outside the home can seem more glorious. People applaud your efforts. They appreciate what you do. In a home full of little ones, that is not always the case. Sometimes you can go a whole day working like crazy and not hear one thank you (without prompting). So once again it comes down to “What are woman called to do.” Titus 2: 5 pretty much says it, ‘keepers at home’. Will this always be a glamorous job? No, but I believe it can be a fulfilling job if your heart is in the right place. The question that Debi raised that I have been asking myself, “Do I have eternity in my heart?” Are the daily decisions that I make concerning my husband to benefit me for the here and now or do they reflect my willingness to be a servant and think of how today will affect me for eternity. Do I seek to honor God and obey His word in the daily moment by moment choices I make. Take time to read Titus 2:3-5.

Chapter 15

First I’ll address the practical side of this chapter. In talking about running a smooth household, Debi says that planning is a must. Planning ahead has never been a problem for me. I am a plan aheader. So much that I have to be careful not to get upset when my plan doesn’t work out. But one thing that I know I need to work on is meal time timing. Not that I don’t have meals planned and ready on time. We have a 6 week menu plan that helps us to be well prepared for meal times. But my problem is the flexibility with meals. Being on the farm you have to sometimes have a meal ready 2 minutes ago J. So me and my big plans and perfect schedule don’t always work here. I need to work on my attitude when Mark wants lunch at 11:00 or 11:30 or supper at 4:00. I need to be prepared to be able to make a quick meal if need be. She also talks about using a crock pot. I haven’t used one much except when on Sunday’s when we were expecting company for lunch. Mostly because it is too small for us to cook most things in. I was wondering if anyone out there uses a crock pot and what you make in it. One of the thing I have learned in regards to food. ‘If your going to make it, you might as well make it big’. So if I make a meal, I will often double it (for us that sometimes means 6x a normal recipe) and throw the extra in the freezer for those times when I need a quick meal for one reason or another. It comes in handy when sickness hits, you want to bring a meal to someone, or things are just real busy. As I mentioned we have a 6 week meal plan. The plan is for breakfast & supper Monday-Friday. Lunch is always sandwiches. Wednesday is soup day. Leftovers are on Saturday and we have a list of meals to choose from on Sundays, depending on if we are having company ect. A meal plan helps us to get the meat defrosted, it helps us to eat a well balanced and healthy diet, and we know what groceries to buy for the week. We buy our groceries 50 minutes from home so we can’t just run uptown to get an ingredient. I strongly recommend making a meal plan. It has helped us out a lot. Having done all this I rarely have an excuse not to have a meal ready for my husband. If there is a time that I don’t have a meal ready, it is usually because I was more concerned about my own time than his or just got plain lazy. What about having a clean house? For me this has always been important. I feel I can function better when my house is clean and so can everyone else. I find if the dishes are not done and the floor is not swept, I have a harder time being motivated for the rest of my daily duties. ‘A place for everything.’ That’s what I have found is needed if I expect other people to help put keep things clean. If I have a specified place for things it helps everyone know where things belong. Our house is full of labeled shelves and rubbermaid/plastic containers. Sometimes housework can feel so unrewarding. It seems as soon as you clean it, it gets messed up again. Even though our house isn’t always perfectly clean, we do try to keep it tidy. Like I said, we feel more motivated and if we have unexpected company, it says to them, “We honor you enough to have a tidy house to greet you.” I have been in some homes where dishes are undone, the floor is dirty and it just feels dirty. Some of these places I don’t even want to let my baby crawl on the floor. I don’t want to be one of these homes that our company feels uncomfortable in. On the flip side, I used to be a clean freak. We hardly had company over because the house was rarely ‘clean enough’. Years of experience and ten children later has kind of cured me of this. I have realized it is not about a perfect home, I have many children and my house is going to reflect this. So I have had to find the balance between cleanliness and perfectionism. So I think that covers the practical side. Part 2 will be tomorrow.

Another Belated Birthday

Well once again I am very late at getting a birthday greeting out to our last birthday celebrator. Kerri had a birthday on February 11th. Every time I hear February 11 I have to smile because I can hear her little 2 yr. old voice when we would ask her when her birthday was. With a cute little grin and a baby voice she would say, Febuary Eleven. Because we have this on video and have listened to it and smiled at it over and over again, none of us will ever forget when Kerri’s birthday is. Good move Kerri!

We have now hit the milestone of 4 teenagers in our family. When our oldest four were younger I often thought about what these days would be like. I didn’t even dream at the time that when they were all teens we would have 6 other children in the picture. But I never dreaded these years; I always looked forward to them with anticipation.

We have never bought into the lie that it is normal for teenagers to rebel. Instead, we have trained and nurtured their relationship with God our relationship with them in hopes of having great years with them in their teens. And today I can say with confidence, ‘It is not normal for teens to rebel. It doesn’t have to be something to dread or fear.’ We have 4 of them, they are great, and we love the different level of relationship that we now share with them. And to those of you who have said, “You just wait until they are teens!” Here we are thank you for your concern, but YOU WERE WRONG!” And I say all this not to toot our own horn, because without the wisdom that comes from God, I know we would not be where we are today. It is only because of Him that we can enjoy these years and look forward to when our other children become teens. But I say this to those of you who are dreading these years. If you train their heart to love the Lord God and they desire to please Him, you will enjoy these years. They are a lot of fun! You don’t get any sleep, but they are a lot of fun!

Anyway, back to Kerri. When I think about Kerri and what she adds to our family I think of someone who doesn’t think of herself and is ready and willing to serve. When she was younger she often asked me if there was anything she could do to help me. Now that she is older she hardly has time to ask because I keep her quite busy :) But for the most part I know that if I need Kerri to do something, she will do it with a willing and cheerful heart. Another thing that I really appreciate about her is her heart to help her daddy. What 12 year old girl do you know that can drive a manure spreader as good as the rest of them? You will often find her beside her dad doing the ‘dirty’ jobs that come with the farm and she does it without a complaint on her lips. I could learn a thing or two from her!

It’s hard for me to believe that Kerri is just 13. She has been so responsible for so long that in my mind she is much more mature and older than what 13 is in our culture today. Because she was the youngest of our four stair steps, she kind of just went along with what they all did. So she got the privileges of her older siblings younger than they did, but with that she also had to pull the weight around the house as they did. By 11 she was taking her turn with the wash, baking bread, making meals and doing her fair share around the home. Sometimes I forgot how old she really was and had to give my head a shake to remind myself what she was capable of.

She has always had a soft spot in her heart for her little siblings. You can often find her playing games with them, making a treasure hunt for them, or just tickling and cuddling them. If there are little children around when we go somewhere, she will usually hunt them down and be found playing with them. She is also very giving and if she goes away for the day with dad and mom and her older sisters stay home to babysit, she will often get them a thank you gift.

She has always been very quick to make a wrong right. Ever since she was very little she would ask for forgiveness when she knew she was in the wrong. That is a very special trait that not many of us have and I believe is shows the humility that is in her heart.

She loves to play games and is often found with her sisters playing dutch blitz. Sometimes they humor me and I play too but…..let’s just say my reflexes are not what they used to be! She also likes to do word searches and play good ol’ fashioned solitaire when she can find no one who wants to play a game (quite rare around here!)

Some of her favorite things: Hot chocolate, goats, potatoe chips, cat collars (don’t ask), a good ol’ chicken meal with mashed potatoes, cream puffs, math (okay, maybe not her favorite thing!)

The verse that comes to my mind when I think of Kerri is from Philippians 2:3 "Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself."

Kerri, we hope this will be a year that you will look back and say that you learned to love God more and grew closer to Him.

Worldly Influence

This week we listened to a message by Douglas Philips (can't remember the name of it right now) and he said something that has really stuck with me. He asked the question, "If you were on a deserted island and all you had to read/entertain you was your Bible, would you live differently?" Now I know you are thinking, 'Of course I would live differentlly, I wouldn't have most of my things!' Of course this was just to make a point, and with me it did. How much of my thinking and the way that I live is governed by the way things are done around me and have always been done. Or by the movies that I watch, the books that I read. How about the people that I try to be like or try to impress? I think if I had only God's word to influence me (and my family), I would do things differently. I would be much more conscious of what God teaches me in His Word of how to live. But really this shouldn't be, and that is why this has really made me think. Romans 12:1-2 says "I beseech you, brethren, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to GodAnd be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." I am sad to say that too many times, my thinking & my actions reflect my being conformed to this world instead of being transformed my the renewing of my mind and proving God's perfect, good and acceptable will. This is a constant process, renewing my mind with the things of God. So my challenge to you today, "What is governing the things you do, the way you think?

Kings & Kingdoms Chpt. 14

I will start by giving my favorite quotes of this chapter. When you neglect to reverence your husband, you are taking something precious away from yourself, your children & your husband. It is God’s will for you to reverence your husband. Reverence is not just how you act; it’s how you feel & how you respond with your word & with your body language. It is not enough to get up & serve him; your eyes and the quick, carefree swing of your body must indicate your delight to be engaged in serving your man. Deference to your man is the height of true femininity. It makes a woman beautiful, gracious and lovely to all (*not weak as the world would like you to believe) and especially to him. Words with * are my input. This week Debi asked us to make a list of things we should do that will cause our husband to feel your honor, respect & reverence. I encourage you to do this, even if you haven’t read the book. And don’t just make a list but try to do it! Also once again I would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter.

Chapter 13

“This is a great mystery; but I speak concerning Christ and the church….and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” (Eph. 5:32-33) REVERENCE: to revere, to be in awe; fear mingled with respect & esteem. As I continue on this journey, daily I am becoming more and more aware of how I thought I reverenced my husband most of the time, but really I don’t. Not when I look at this definition. My marriage to my husband prepares me for my marriage to Christ. I like how Debi made the statement that I am sure most of us would think, 'But it would be easy to be married to Christ!' Then she names some of the things that God required of people in the Bible. Abraham and Isaac, Sapphira. Right…. maybe not so easy, unless your heart is 100% committed and submissive. The story of Abraham and Isaac is my favorite story in the Bible. The way Abraham was so absolutely obedient to God touches me time and time again. How Abraham, even though he didn’t understand, was willing to do what God asked him to do, and he did it quickly. The Bible says that he woke up early. This always struck me. He didn’t procrastinate, try to reason with God, drag his heals, but rather he got up early and went to do the task that God commanded him to do. We can only imagine what Abraham was thinking on that journey since the Bible doesn’t say. Was he so 100% trusting of God that there were no questions? Did he know in his heart that God knew what was best and was willing to follow what he said no matter what the cost to him? Even his son who he had waited so long for? And then what God said to Abraham after he stopped him from sacrificing Isaac brings me to tears every time. “Now I know that you fear God.” I have read this story many, many times, but never have I thought of it in the light of today. Am I submissive to my husband as Abraham was to God. Can my husband say to me, “Now I know that you fear God”? I had determined years ago, after watching other wives complain about their husbands behind their back, that I would never do this to my husband. I would not complain about him to anyone, not even my family, closest friends or church leader. This is one of the best decisions I have made in my relationship with my husband. In complaining to others I would only put my husband down and stir up discontent in my heart. I have heard people complain of their husband in the name of ‘prayer’. “Please pray for my husband, he is struggling with so and so”. I have one thing to say….hmmmm. Is this really the motive? If my husband has an issue that I think needs prayer, then I pray! I once read a testimony of a mother who said something like this to her daughter before her wedding day, “When you are married I will be there for advice on cooking, sewing, and the womanly things of running a household, but don’t you ever come to me and complain about your husband. If you do I will promptly send you back to him.” I have since told my daughters this same thing. I think it is great advice. The story of the ‘Queen for a Day’ was especially meaningful to me as I have been thinking a lot about my witness to my children in the way I treat my husband. They are watching every move I make. My girls are learning from me how to treat their heavenly Father, their earthly father and Lord willing someday their own husband. Our boys are learning from me how to honor and respect their dad. I am glad today is a new day, because many days I fail miserably as a godly example. Even though I cannot erase those things in which I have failed, I can start again today. I want my children to be able to honor their dad in the way that I honor him. I have felt the eyes of my children when my husband does something that they think is unfair. They look at me, for my reaction. I am learning to support him, even thought it’s not always ‘MY WAY’! They are watching:) I could go on and on here, but I won’t. There are so many other things in this chapter. Words, how comfortable am I making our home, responding to my husband with scorn or ridicule…….. Tell me a bit about how your ‘help meet’ journey is going. Even if you are not doing the study with us, leave a comment.

Snow, Snow, Snow

What better to do on yet another snowy day

but to cozy up by the fire and puzzle.

P.S. Check out our recipe blog for a new recipe (link on the side bar)

By Divine Appointment Chpt. 12

But I would have you know that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. (I Cor. 11:3) As I read this chapter I was reminded of my journey of being a wife and getting into my head that I was accountable for me and my actions. I will not be accountable to God for the things that are my husband’s responsibilities, I will be accountable for my heart and my actions. That releases me from having to ‘fix’ my husband’s shortcomings. I need to be reminded every day that it is my heart I need to work on, not his. In fact this is something we tell our children all the time. When they come to us with a complaint about one of their siblings we ask them how their heart is. We proceed to tell them that all they can do is work on their heart, and that they cannot change someone else’s. They can pray for them, but they cannot change them. Another thing that struck me again about this chapter was the phrase she used when speaking about a woman’s role in the church she says, “It is not about being qualified, it is about being authorized.” I think so many times as women, just because we are capable of doing something, we usurp our husbands authority and go ahead and do things, in the church or wherever. This is not God's qualifications. His qualifications are very clear in the Bible. Read (I Cor. 14:34-35). Over the years I have come across many people who have criticized my role in submission to my husband. One comment has been, but if you submit, become a servant, honour ect, won’t you become a doormat, something your husband will take advantage of? I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but a great example to me of how this doesn't happen was last harvest season. I had determined in my heart that I was going to be a non complaining, willing help meet to my husband. I had imagined that I would be spending my whole fall in the field, I would get no canning done and I would basically be spending all my time helping him. And I was okay with that (although I still had to work on my attitude somedays). Well what actually happened was last fall was one that I got the most canning done ever and I probably spent less time in the field that I have had to previously. I saw God multiply my time at home and show me that He was in control. I believe that He honored my actions and let me tell you, I felt nothing like a doormat! I remember an analogy that I heard when I was younger. God is like an umbrella. He protects me like an umbrella protects me from the rain. But when I move outside God’s will and plan for my life, I move out from under the umbrella and open myself up to ‘get wet’! And I believe it is that way with our husbands as well, my position under my husband is where God put me for my own spiritual, emotional and physical safety. It is the only place I will find real fulfillment as a woman. pg 117 If I move out of that God given protection, I open myself up to things that God has not planned for me. As I reflected on these principles I asked myself two questions: 1.What would happen to the marriages in the church if women would truly, with all their heart submit to their husband. Would the disturbing divorce rate go down? 2. pg. 122 Is my marriage glorious? Is it an example in Heaven of how God wants Christ and the Church to be? “For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church; and he is the saviour of the body.” (Eph. 5:23) It would be great to hear from you. What from this chapter challenged you?

Respect for Life Week

As I was meditating on the fact that it is 'Respect for Life Week' I got that all too familiar sick feeling in my stomach thinking about what is being done to these precious little babies. The anger I felt for those who would even consider taking a life.

Being through 10 pregnancies I know very well the feeling of having that little miracle inside of you. Abortion is all so sad. And yet so many times I feel so helpless. I would love to counsel some of these women who think there is no other way. But right now God has given me my own precious gifts to care for and love. So today I asked myself, What can I do?


I was surfing the internet trying to find a poem or something to post in honor of this week set aside for the Respect for Life. Instead I came across a site with quotes from doctors/nurses who have performed abortions. As I read these quotes of people who take lives I realized what I can do. I can pray ferverently for these who are so deceived and who have become so hardened. The guilt and the shame they must go through continuously. No matter how hard they are, this must still affect them.

So my prayer today is: "God open their eyes, humble their hearts, bring them to repentance. Help them to know that in You there is hope and forgiveness. "

I hope you will join your hearts with me in prayer for those and others who have made quotes similiar to these.


NOTE: THIS CONTENT MAY DISTURB SOME READERS
Think of it this way- what is the best way to learn about abortion? To actually witness an abortion first hand or to work in a clinic. The second best thing is to read verified eye-witness accounts from people who are current and former abortion providers. These quotes have been tracked down from a number of sources, from the research of pro-choice author Magda Denes to the Washington Post to other magazines.

"In fact many women will come to me considering abortion, and I have been personally told that I am to turn the monitor away from her view so that seeing her baby jump around on the screen does not influence her choice." Shari Richards, quoted from the John Ankerburg Show on 3/7/90

"They [the women] are never allowed to look at the ultrasound because we knew that if they so much as heard the heart beat, they wouldn't want to have an abortion."-Dr. Randall



"We tried to avoid the women seeing them [the fetuses] They always wanted to know the sex, but we lied and said it was too early to tell. It's better for the women to think of the fetus as an 'it.'--Abortion clinic worker Norma Eidelman quoted in Rachel Weeping p 34


"Sometimes we lied. A girl might ask what her baby was like at a certain point in the pregnancy: Was it a baby yet? Even as early as 12 weeks a baby is totally formed, he has fingerprints, turns his head, fans his toes, feels pain. But we would say 'It's not a baby yet. It's just tissue, like a clot.'"--Kathy Sparks told in "The Conversion of Kathy Sparks" by Gloria Williamson, Christian Herald Jan 1986 p 28


"Now, the baby I aborted was eleven weeks old, and can you imagine what this did to me when I saw this baby with the hands and face, sucking his thumb? And they told me it was a cluster of cells!"--Carole K.State Director of Women Exploited By Abortion. From Women Exploited, which is a sampling of the stories of WEBA (Women Exploited by Abortion) chapter members.


I had taken anatomy, I was a medical student. I knew what I was looking at. There was a little scapula and an arm, I saw some ribs and a chest, and a little tiny head. I saw a piece of a a leg, and a tiny hand and an arm, and you know, it was like somebody put a hot poker into me. I had a conscience, and it hurt. Well, I checked it out and there were two arms and two legs and one head and so forth, and I turned and said "I guess you got it all.' That was a very hard experience to go through emotionally.--abortionist


"I remember an experience as a resident on a hysterectomy. I remember seeing the baby move underneath the sack of membranes, as the caesarean incision was made, before the doctor broke the water.
The thought came to me, "My God, that's a person" Then he broke the water. And when he broke the water, it was like I had a pain in my heart, just like when I saw that first suction abortion. And then he delivered the baby,. and I couldn't touch it.. I wasn't much of an assistant. I just stood there, and the reality of what was doing on finally began to seep into my calloused brain and heart.
They took that little baby that was making little sounds and moving and kicking, and set it on that table in a cold, stainless steel bowl. Every time I would look over while we were repairing the incision in uterus and finishing the Caesarean, I would see that little person moving in that bowl. And it kicked and moved less and less, of course, as time went on. I can remember going over and looking at the baby when we were done with the surgery and the baby was still alive. You could see the chest was moving and the heart was beating, and the baby would try to take a little breath, and it really hurt inside, and it began to educate me as to what abortion really was." quoted in "Pro-Choice 1990: Skeletons in the Closet"



"You have to become a bit schizophrenic. In one room, you encourage the patient that the slight irregularity in the fetal heart is not important, that she is going to have a fine, healthy baby. Then, in the next room you assure another woman, on whom you just did a saline abortion, that it is a good thing that the heartbeat is already irregular....she has nothing to worry about, she will NOT have a live baby...All of a sudden one noticed that at the time of the saline infusion there was a lot of activity in the uterus. That's not fluid currents. That's obviously the fetus being distressed by swallowing the concentrated salt solution and kicking violently and that's to all intents and purposes, the death trauma. ..somebody has to do it, and unfortunately we are the executioners in this instance..."--abortionist Dr.Szenes



The first time, I felt like a murderer, but I did it again and again and again, and now, 20 years later, I am facing what happened to me as a doctor and as a human being. Sure, I got hard. Sure, the money was important. And oh, it was an easy thing, once I had taken the step, to see the women as animals and the babies as just tissue."--abortionist quoted from a radio talk show by John Rice in "Abortion" Litt D. Murfreesboro, TN.



"Nobody wants to perform abortions after ten weeks, because by then you see the features of the baby, hands, feet. It's really barbaric."--abortionist quoted in M.D. Doctors Talk About Themselves by John Pekkanen p 93



The doctors would remove the fetus while performing hysterectomies and then lay it on the table., where it would squirm until it died. ..They all had perfect forms and shapes. I couldn't take it. No nurse could."--Joyce Craig, director of a Brooklyn clinic of Planned Parenthood. who assisted in abortion for two months, then quit. p 34



I want the general public to know what the doctors know- that this is a person, this is a baby. That this is not some kind of blob of tissue."--Dr. Anthony Levantino



I am deeply troubled by my own increasing certainty that I have in fact presided over 60,000 deaths. There is no longer serious doubt in my mind that human life exists from the very onset of pregnancy"--Dr. Bernard Nathanson, "Deeper Into Abortion" New England Journal of Medicine Nov 1974 p 1189



"Even if you are pro-choice, no one likes to see a dead fetus." -Vilma Valdez, Education Director Planned Parenthood of Greater Miami, The Miami Herald, Oct 24 1992

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY